I would like to think that I am raising mychildren to the best of my ability. There is no manual to teach kids and makingsure to love them but not spoil them is one of my top priorities. Especiallysince we have four kids and have considered having more. Deciding to spoil fourcan cause serious problems in my household and hinder them from growing as aperson. I have to admit that over thepast year I have been hard my hubby who does the spoiling. He means well(giving the kids the love he missed when he was younger) but sometimes he goesoverboard. This cause the kids to have asense of entitlement and let me tell you something….Kids should not think thatthey run, own, or pay for anything. This is not the way a household should be run.Let me give you an example of when things tried to get out of control and I hadto remind them who is the BOSS. Right before school started we were in themiddle of moving. We had just come back from my sis’s wedding so we were on a budgetso that we could make sure we were able to pay for all the things needed suchas shoes, uniforms, school supplies, moving truck, closing cost, and bills. Wewere in the store getting school supplies, mind you I went earlier but had toget some last minute stuff that teachers requested like dry erase markers,paper towels and hand sanitizer. The kids know not to ask for things but everynow and then they forget, which is normal because their “Kids”. We were in lineand I’m paying for stuff, when my oldest boys ask can they go look at the 50cent toy machines. Should I mention that I hate these machines because they area waste of money!! Anyways, my oldestboys come up to my husband and I and say “Can we get some money, please for themachine?” Of course, I look and say “NO we don’t have money for that!”.Normally my kids would be like okay, but I think the sun was affecting theirbrains, because my oldest says “It’s only 50 cent!!!” My immediately reactionwas “EXCUSE ME.” Now in my opinion this was disrespectful for two reasons…
1. What I say goes there is no talking back
2. They don’t have money so they should not respondin such a manner
At this point I was upset, but I kept cool. I gave my kidsthe look and we all walked out the store. Now when we walked out to the car Iimmediately checked my kids. I let them know that they do not have jobs and 50cent is a lot to person with no money. I also let them know that I amdisappointed in their behavior and there will be punishment for that type ofbehavior. We went off to the car with me still rambling about the importance ofrespecting my word and not acting spoiled. Once in the car, I decided thepunishment. “NO NEW BOOKBAGS!!!” Thismay seem extreme but I needed them to understand that disrespect and entitlementwill not be tolerated. Now I know someof you’ll are thinking why didn’t I just ground them, but it’s important that Ikeep my kids grounded at all times. Grounded them would have done nothing,because it had nothing to do with money. I needed them to understand who hasthe money and who makes the decision on who is going to spend it. Last thing I need is for them to think that Iowe them something and that I have buy them something. I always tell them thatthere are children who don’t get new things for school and have to get usedstuff or nothing at all. I want them to understand that we work for what wehave and all things that are given to them they have to work for unless it’stheir birthday of course, or family and friends want to give them something.They do chores daily and they earn money by helping me with big task and makinggood grades and good behavior in school. We buy nice things for them because welove them not because we have to.
Needless to say I believe they understand now. We have beento the store several times and they have never asked for anything. So my hubby(remember I told you he spoils them) bought them those tattoos the wanted. Hereis them showing off their tattoos.
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